One of my best friends is the sweetest person ever and she has treated me to trips, nice gifts, etc. because she has the means and just likes to make people happy so even though she can buy herself whatever she wants, I STILL always get her gifts for her birthday, treat her to dinner sometimes, pay for some things when we go on trips, etc. It really is a rwo way street but sometimes one person can just do more and they're okay with that, as long as everyone is appreciative and doesn't take advantage, it's a really nice thing.
I don’t understand the obsession the younger people have with buying things for each other only to turn around and send Venmo requests. I’ll pay my own way thank you. If I can’t afford something I’ll let you know I’m not doing it. Separate checks preserve friendships.
I went on holiday with my partner and two of our friends. We all earn exactly the same (we're all teachers and were open about money) and so the bills were split equally, no matter what we each atw or drank or whatever. It was so much easier.
BUT none of us would have done that if one of us was uncomfortable for whatever reason.
If I give a treat, it’s for people I truly care about and I don’t expect pay-back in any form. It’s nice if they pick up coffee ‘cos they feel bad about it but I don’t expect it.
Who is that “guru” girl giving money advice? I try to google her but nobody knows only here in youtube. It is a bit contradicted that someone tells you be careful with your money but at the same time is selling you in her channel unnecessary items such jewelry or bags in amazon. Again, not a hate, I am just confused
Yes absolutely correct. No leeches or one way people. Cheapos are not exactly good friends to have around. There’s giving but also reciprocating… equal balance… test your friends out. Some will bleed you dry and you can tell they won’t reciprocate when you’re in a bind
That is so true! I'm more generous with my friends that don't expect it because they know I make more than them. Those are the same friends that with their little, will buy me my favorite snack or something thoughtful. ❤❤❤
Im a student. Whenever me and my friends go out for dinner, we usually split our bill. Its sort of unspoken mutual aggreement that we will keep our money related tab clear. And also because we all are students that's another reason. But I really want to treat my friends in the future when I start earning money.
So spot on. You are not obligated to give more just because you have more. Friendships are about friendship, not money. Idc if your best friend is Kylie Jenner rich, you're an adult, you are responsible for providing for yourself.
Exaaaaactly. My ex was literally so financially nitpicky, I'm talking about making me pay for my own McDonalds separately at a drive thru, or wanting that $2.30 back from a lunch date, etc. When I would frequently pay for our dates while much less well off than her. I was more than happy to, but the nitpicking got on my nerves so much.
We're in a 2 year relationship, you have $70k in the bank, and you're worrying about less than 3 bucks from a date for food? When I every week would buy the ingredients for, and make dinner? It makes no sense!
👍❤️I agree 💯.I donot go out unless I can afford to pay the entire bill although I know my friends will willingly contribute. and I am not rich and live with a disability. I also predetermine my budget.
I used to go out to lunch with coworker groups and they would want to split the bill equally regardless of who ordered what. Drove me nuts because I eat very little and drink water. Stopped that because it didn’t make sense to me. I found that those coworker/friends that I actually enjoy spending time with we will go out for lunch and if I choose the location, I pay the bill and that goes in turns back-and-forth.
I get the point. I have to say I am now at a point where I am not as cheap anymore, but despite what everyone says, growing up with little money doesn’t always make you generous. I struggled a lot when I was in school or still studying and I wouldn’t have had the balls to always ask for seemingly ridiculous amounts of money, but I would absolutely expect people offer to pay it back. It’s also how I was raised. I went to a friend after school regularly, so my mum sent her mum some money to cover the food cost, knowing how hard it is to feed an extra mouth. When going out for dinner with my friends, I would get the cheapest dish and the cheapest drink and I would absolutely not split the bill equally because if I had the money to do that u would have gotten something proper to eat, right? It takes a lot of time to change your relationship with money and when someone comes from a less privileged background I am not asking you to do anything for them, but don’t judge them too quickly. It’s hard not having any money in a world where money is so important.
I once got an invitation from a close relative. My husband and I have helped her family a lot. We were shocked when she placed an order online, picked it up and then asked me and my family to send her the money via Venmo for our food. It was awful.
I both feel similarly but also have a unique experience in that I'm a significantly higher earner than most of my friends. Because of this, I recognized that I had to make a trade-off of either paying for my friends to have some experiences that I wanted to have with them or only having experiences that they could afford. I've paid for the full meal regularly when my friends and I go out to dinner, I've paid the majority when going on vacation with friends and even bought airline tickets for friends so that they could come with me on those trips. I am by no means wealthy, but I recognize that I have the financial means to enjoy and share my life with my friends in the ways that I want to without making them feel guilty or burdened by my desire to do something fun with them that they may not be able to fully afford on their own.
These are excellent, close friends that are there for me through thick and thin and deserve the world. There is no tit for tat in those sorts of relationships.
I will say there’s a stigma with generational wealth. I as a first gen, saw how hard my parents worked so their frugal thoughts/habits on money extended to me. How they saved and paved the way is also how I learned to create my own wealth on top. I split the bill, always down to the cent but I also do just get “thinking of you gifts” and do treat for special occasions.
This!! I treat people all the time, all I ask is for a treat within thwir means next time we meet. I dont mind spending $100 on a big dinner if they bring me coffee the next week, you know?
I find that people who have less are usually the first to give. They know else it’s like to have nothing. No matter my financial situation, somebody has it worse so I will give whatever I can. 🤷🏻♀️
43 comments
One of my best friends is the sweetest person ever and she has treated me to trips, nice gifts, etc. because she has the means and just likes to make people happy so even though she can buy herself whatever she wants, I STILL always get her gifts for her birthday, treat her to dinner sometimes, pay for some things when we go on trips, etc. It really is a rwo way street but sometimes one person can just do more and they're okay with that, as long as everyone is appreciative and doesn't take advantage, it's a really nice thing.
I ABSOLUTELY agree with you!
I don’t understand the obsession the younger people have with buying things for each other only to turn around and send Venmo requests. I’ll pay my own way thank you. If I can’t afford something I’ll let you know I’m not doing it. Separate checks preserve friendships.
I went on holiday with my partner and two of our friends. We all earn exactly the same (we're all teachers and were open about money) and so the bills were split equally, no matter what we each atw or drank or whatever. It was so much easier.
BUT none of us would have done that if one of us was uncomfortable for whatever reason.
If I give a treat, it’s for people I truly care about and I don’t expect pay-back in any form. It’s nice if they pick up coffee ‘cos they feel bad about it but I don’t expect it.
YES!!!
Who venoms for $0.30!! Insane.
Who is that “guru” girl giving money advice? I try to google her but nobody knows only here in youtube. It is a bit contradicted that someone tells you be careful with your money but at the same time is selling you in her channel unnecessary items such jewelry or bags in amazon. Again, not a hate, I am just confused
how much do you contribute to mutual aid outside of people you enjoy spending time with QUICK
Choose another pic for the thumbnail. This one looks bad.
I agree!!!
Great make up! I have a friend? That thinks because I make more money than her..that I should pay!! I always say NO WAY!!
Haaa .30????
Asking for $ half the lightbulb is outrageously petty. It’s not the money but the pettiness.
Yes absolutely correct. No leeches or one way people. Cheapos are not exactly good friends to have around. There’s giving but also reciprocating… equal balance… test your friends out. Some will bleed you dry and you can tell they won’t reciprocate when you’re in a bind
Exactly
People ask for 30 cents back omg
I was with you until the last part. Whew! Catty!
That is so true! I'm more generous with my friends that don't expect it because they know I make more than them. Those are the same friends that with their little, will buy me my favorite snack or something thoughtful. ❤❤❤
Im a student. Whenever me and my friends go out for dinner, we usually split our bill. Its sort of unspoken mutual aggreement that we will keep our money related tab clear. And also because we all are students that's another reason. But I really want to treat my friends in the future when I start earning money.
So spot on. You are not obligated to give more just because you have more. Friendships are about friendship, not money. Idc if your best friend is Kylie Jenner rich, you're an adult, you are responsible for providing for yourself.
So beautifully said! You have a gift from articulating very well and just speaking from your heart
Exaaaaactly. My ex was literally so financially nitpicky, I'm talking about making me pay for my own McDonalds separately at a drive thru, or wanting that $2.30 back from a lunch date, etc. When I would frequently pay for our dates while much less well off than her. I was more than happy to, but the nitpicking got on my nerves so much.
We're in a 2 year relationship, you have $70k in the bank, and you're worrying about less than 3 bucks from a date for food? When I every week would buy the ingredients for, and make dinner? It makes no sense!
👍❤️I agree 💯.I donot go out unless I can afford to pay the entire bill although I know my friends will willingly contribute. and I am not rich and live with a disability. I also predetermine my budget.
That's why the light bulb girl is rich! Lol.
I used to go out to lunch with coworker groups and they would want to split the bill equally regardless of who ordered what. Drove me nuts because I eat very little and drink water. Stopped that because it didn’t make sense to me.
I found that those coworker/friends that I actually enjoy spending time with we will go out for lunch and if I choose the location, I pay the bill and that goes in turns back-and-forth.
So true 👍
❤❤❤❤❤
Well said
I get the point. I have to say I am now at a point where I am not as cheap anymore, but despite what everyone says, growing up with little money doesn’t always make you generous. I struggled a lot when I was in school or still studying and I wouldn’t have had the balls to always ask for seemingly ridiculous amounts of money, but I would absolutely expect people offer to pay it back. It’s also how I was raised. I went to a friend after school regularly, so my mum sent her mum some money to cover the food cost, knowing how hard it is to feed an extra mouth. When going out for dinner with my friends, I would get the cheapest dish and the cheapest drink and I would absolutely not split the bill equally because if I had the money to do that u would have gotten something proper to eat, right? It takes a lot of time to change your relationship with money and when someone comes from a less privileged background I am not asking you to do anything for them, but don’t judge them too quickly. It’s hard not having any money in a world where money is so important.
I had to watch it a second time because I thought I had must have missed something with the light of her lamps but nope, just ridiculous 😄
Yeah. Proportional contributions is key
Would have Blocked her
Agreed
I once got an invitation from a close relative. My husband and I have helped her family a lot. We were shocked when she placed an order online, picked it up and then asked me and my family to send her the money via Venmo for our food. It was awful.
What is with everyone putting on makeup while they talk about something completely unrelated??
I couldn’t refocus after that tiny amount of sunscreen padding. 😂
this is so true. If someone is generous towards me, I'm willing to double what he/she paid for me the next time we go out.
I both feel similarly but also have a unique experience in that I'm a significantly higher earner than most of my friends. Because of this, I recognized that I had to make a trade-off of either paying for my friends to have some experiences that I wanted to have with them or only having experiences that they could afford. I've paid for the full meal regularly when my friends and I go out to dinner, I've paid the majority when going on vacation with friends and even bought airline tickets for friends so that they could come with me on those trips.
I am by no means wealthy, but I recognize that I have the financial means to enjoy and share my life with my friends in the ways that I want to without making them feel guilty or burdened by my desire to do something fun with them that they may not be able to fully afford on their own.
These are excellent, close friends that are there for me through thick and thin and deserve the world. There is no tit for tat in those sorts of relationships.
Or when you go out to eat ask the server to spilt the bill.
I will say there’s a stigma with generational wealth. I as a first gen, saw how hard my parents worked so their frugal thoughts/habits on money extended to me. How they saved and paved the way is also how I learned to create my own wealth on top. I split the bill, always down to the cent but I also do just get “thinking of you gifts” and do treat for special occasions.
This!! I treat people all the time, all I ask is for a treat within thwir means next time we meet. I dont mind spending $100 on a big dinner if they bring me coffee the next week, you know?
I find that people who have less are usually the first to give. They know else it’s like to have nothing. No matter my financial situation, somebody has it worse so I will give whatever I can. 🤷🏻♀️